Your Guide to Holiday Eating With a Chronic Illness
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The holidays. A time of year where we get together with friends, family and colleagues to celebrate. Usually with lots of food and beverages.
That can be incredibly intimidating if you are currently healing from a chronic illness such as an autoimmune disease like IBD, Crohn’s Disease, Celiac’s Disease, Hashimotos, etc. or any array of gut/digestive issues, including SIBO, IBS, leaky gut, food sensitivities/allergies. It can even be challenging if you are on an elimination or restricted diet as part of a healing protocol, or if you follow a ketogenic, paleolithic or any other kind of lifestyle.
Trust me. I’ve been there. It’s uncomfortable. It can create unwanted stress and tension. It can make you feel self conscious. And those are the last things you want to feel during the cheerful holiday seasons, especially when you are out with loved ones at parties or family gatherings.
You may want to just give in and eat those problem foods just to avoid causing a scene or feeling ungrateful. Before you do, let’s strategize!
Saying yes to some things is OK, but you should never feel guilty for prioritizing your health and what’s best for you. Take it from someone who has been struggling with digestive issues since 2012. I used to be that way. It took me a long time to realize that I am the only one that’s going to advocate for me, and that it’s OK to say no.
Tips for Managing Your Health During the Holidays
Plan ahead. If you are going to a restaurant or other establishment where a menu is available online, do your due diligence and scope it out ahead of time so that you know what options, if any are available for your specific needs/diet. Most restaurants will gladly amend menu items if you have food sensitivities or allergies, and can accommodate almost anything. I always ask for chicken and steamed veggies if there’s nothing on the menu that works for me.
Offer to bring a side dish. If you’re going to a gathering or social where the host is providing food and beverage, offer to bring a side dish or entree that works for your diet. That way you can go into the event knowing that there will be at least one thing you can eat that won’t make you sick.
Ask your host to label foods or inquire about ingredients. You should always feel to empowered share dietary restrictions and ask about food ingredients. Whether that’s asking if there will be food labels (if buffet style) or checking with the host ahead of time to let her/him know of your dietary restrictions, don’t feel embarrassed to advocate for yourself and to ask questions that serve you and your health. I have learned to do this, but it wasn’t always easy.
Eat ahead of time. It’s never a bad idea to eat something light before a party so that you don’t overeat, which is very easy to do at holiday parties, especially when there’s alcohol (or cannabis) involved. I always have a little something in my stomach so that I can focus on socializing and meeting people instead of stuffing my face. But that’s just me!
Bring snacks. Snacks are clutch. I never go anywhere without a snack. Whether it’s carrot/celery sticks, travel nut butter packets, beef jerky bars, nuts/seeds, etc., it never hurts to have some quick and easy snacks on hand for any situation. This can also ease your anxiety. Even if you don’t eat them, you at least know you have provisions in your pocket, purse, whatever, that you can grab when the going gets tough.
Know where to draw the line. Maybe there are some foods that affect you more deeply than others. Know which foods you must absolutely avoid and others that might cause minimal upset. For instance, someone with Crohn’s will need to avoid dairy or they could get really sick. Same with a person dealing with Celiac’s and gluten consumption. I don’t have a severe gluten or dairy allergy, I just prefer to not consume them. So I know that if I accidentally or deliberately eat gluten or dairy, it’s not the end of the world.
Have a support system. It’s always reassuring to have a husband, wife, brother, sister, friend, father, mother, etc. on your side. Whoever is your closest party ally, let them know that their support means a lot to you and that you appreciate them having your back during the holiday season. Battling a chronic illness is exhausting and can be very isolating. Having a support system during stressful times can help ease anxieties and can also hopefully put you at ease enough to enjoy the party!
Just say “no thank you”. If someone offers you something that you can’t or don’t want to eat, simply say no thank you. You don’t have to make excuses or apologies or do anything else. Own your body and your decision. If a food doesn’t serve you, then you don’t have to eat it. Your friends, family, colleagues, etc. will hopefully be respectful of that and if they aren’t, perhaps you don’t need them in your life. Healing from a chronic illness or autoimmune disease is incredibly draining and sometimes you don’t have the energy to push back or explain yourself. Conserve your energy for healing. I do this all the time with alcohol. When offered a drink, I just say no thank you. If they ask why not, pester me or deploy peer pressure tactics, I’ll follow up with “I’m not drinking right now.” And leave it at that. Melissa Hartwig Urban of Whole30 has some really great posts on her IG about this tactic. Highly encourage you to check it out. You can search her hashtags #melissaexplainssayingno and #melissaexplainsnotdrinking.
If you want it, make a conscious choice to eat it. This is what we refer to as “food freedom.” Now, this wouldn’t apply to foods you are severely allergic to, but if you are avoiding sugar because “it’s bad for you” but you keep staring at the fudge brownies all night, know that it’s OK to have one — if you want one. Food anxiety is real. And the more we get into restrictive diets, the more it can affect us psychologically. Having treats every once in a while is totally fine. Being stressed out about avoiding “bad” foods doesn’t serve you, or anyone else. It only will fuel your guilt. Give yourself grace. Accept your decision to indulge. And move on. Life is too short. This was a BIG one for me to overcome. I had a legitimate fear around eating sugar. If I had a piece of cake or brownie, I shut down and went into panic mode. It’s taken a lot of work, but I am in a better place now. Still not perfect, but I am slowly learning to give myself grace, and you can too. Because I believe in you!
And know that even if you follow all of these tips, that anything can happen so just be prepared and set yourself up for success by going into the party or event with a positive outlook and some flexibility. Like that time my husband made me hold this (dead) crab… just roll with it!
I wish you all a happy holiday season. May your bellies and hearts be full with nutrient dense foods, and the occasional sugary treat, should you so choose!